One of the great traps in life is the belief that our satisfaction comes from outside of ourselves. The truth is that feeling satisfied is something that comes from the inside. It is a choice that we get to make. Many of us need to learn how to choose our thoughts rather than letting habitual thinking dictate our experiences. While this idea may seem to run counter to the way we have been taught to think about life, it is no less true.
If we want to experience genuine satisfaction, then we must begin within. We must drop our complaints, judgements, fears and worries and choose to be satisfied with who and what we are. We can also extend this satisfaction to all the people and situations in our life. When we do this, amazing things happen. Our positive outlook starts to influence our world and we no longer have to attempt to control people and events in order to feel better.
As teachers and parents, if we want to steer our children toward satisfying lives, we must model for them an attitude of appreciation. This means that we must also learn how to lead satisfying lives. Feeling satisfied does not mean that we agree with or enjoy everything that is going on around us. In fact, feeling satisfied is the first step toward effectively making changes in our world. When we stop struggling and choose to feel satisfied, even in the midst of things that we do not agree with, we recover our power. We tap into our inner resources for inspiration and creative solutions to challenges. This type of energy is contagious and inspires others to get on board with the changes we wish to see.
We had a fourth grade student on campus who frequently came to school very upset. He disliked coming to school and fought the experience. As a result of taking this approach, he made himself feel worse and worse. Together, we helped this student to change his outlook and have better days. It started by giving a space where he felt safe enough to relax and let go of the thoughts that were tormenting him. Once he was calm, we would focus on the aspects of school that he enjoyed and was good at. It did not take long before he was back in class and having a successful day. We can all relate to this student.
If you have been fighting against situations that bother you, it is time to take a new approach. Set aside time to sit quietly and breathe some calming breaths. Become aware of your body and the room where you are sitting. As your mind lightens up, begin to imagine yourself feeling completely satisfied with your situation. You can even repeat to yourself, “I am satisfied” with each calm breath. Before long, the quality of your thinking will improve. You will begin to naturally feel better and your perspective of your situation, along with your experience, will change for the best.
Edward Biagiotti is the co-host of the “Funniest Thing! with Darrell and Ed” podcast on Spotify and Youtube, tune in for more inspiration. He is also an Education Specialist for Culver City Unified School District. If you have any questions, comments, and ideas for future columns, send an email to EdwardBiagiotti@ccusd.org