“What do you think you can accomplish by being tense or anxious, or even by strenuous personal effort?” – Myrtle Fillmore
Taking care of yourself is the most valuable gift you can give to others. So often we think that this is a selfish act. In some ways it is. The thing is, without this simple practice, we are not able to give our best to others. Therefore, learning to take care of ourselves is important, especially when we want to be of service to others.
Self-care is different for everyone because everyone’s needs are different. Some people need eight hours of sleep, others feel chipper after five. Some do well to eat every two hours, while others eat three meals and they are satisfied and energized. Whatever your unique needs are, it is essential that you fill them.
In the school district, many of our students fail to access their potential because they do not get enough sleep, proper nutrition, or both. On the surface, it is easy to look at them as problem children, or get the impression that they are lacking in ability. While everyone learns differently, until their basic needs are met, it is impossible to really know what they are capable of doing in the classroom.
Sometimes there are other, less obvious, needs that must be met. For many students, there is a need for more praise. The kind of praise that tells them that they are amazing just the way they are. I worked with a young man with autism who was the perfect example of this. He was placed in a general education classroom and was more than capable of completing his academic work. Yet, for some reason, he was not always showing his potential in the classroom. After observing him, I noticed that he would withdraw and his work output would suffer dramatically if he felt that he was being criticized. If, however, his initial efforts were praised, he would shine. He would quickly make any changes that were required to complete his assignments and produce work that exceeded many of his classmates.
For him, the praise was paramount to his success. His inner sensitivity was easily derailed by anything less than appreciation. In many ways, we are all more like him than we often realize. When we take the time to support ourselves with loving words, which highlight what we are doing well, we access more of who we are. This always translates into better than expected outcomes.
Perhaps you have been neglecting yourself in some way. Whether it is taking time alone to do nothing, getting more sleep, or doing more of that thing you love to do; it is time to give yourself what you deserve. Start by sitting down and reflecting on what you really want. What is it that naturally floats your boat? Start with small things, and then build on them. When you recognize how important and valuable self-care is, you will naturally want to do more. The beauty is that you will feel compelled to encourage others to do the same.
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Edward Biagiotti is the Inclusion Specialist for Culver City Unified School District. He is also co-host of the popular radio show, Funniest Thing! with Darrell and Ed, to find out more go to www.DarrellandEd.com or send an email to: EdwardBiagiotti@ccusd.org