“Resolve to keep happy, and your joy and you shall form an invincible host against difficulties.” – Helen Keller
When we are in the midst of a busy day, sometimes that last thing we want to hear is someone asking us how feel. For many of us, in those moments, we think that we do not have time for feelings. We have work to do, and what could be more important? Actually, when we have a long list of things to do, paying attention to the way we feel is the most vital.
Whether we are students, employees, or CEOs, we are always interacting with people. The emotional tone of those interactions is an important factor in our success on a daily, and long-term basis. When we feel better, we pour that energy into everything we do. We are also more likely to appreciate our own accomplishments, as well as the work of those around us. In the end, these types of healthy and uplifting interactions create the basis for our own lasting success.
Dealing effectively with our own emotional states is essential because when we do not address them within ourselves, we will project them onto others. Like a child who denies that he is tired, we can wreak havoc on the people around us. By taking time to acknowledge and tend to ourselves, we are able to see the people around us clearly, and the world becomes a much happier place.
Recently, I was working with a group of kindergarten and first grade students. If left to their own devices, this group of students is rather impulsive and will get angry and combative with one another. With a little help, however, they realize that the person they are playing with is not out to get them. By giving these students the words and perspectives to reflect on their own emotional and mental states, it disarms the potential conflicts that might otherwise develop. When students feel like they will get what they need, and that others can get their needs met at the same time, the room starts to harmonize.
A big part of the success of the group hinges on my willingness to take care of my own feelings. If I am not careful, I will turn into the biggest, crankiest kid in the room. By bringing myself back to a happy place, I am able to act as a model for what I want from my students. I am amazed at how quickly the students start to cooperate when I speak to them in a happy, calm voice. It touches my heart to see my students go from wrestling and yelling over the pieces of a building set, to enjoying building the structure together.
When we elevate our mood and live from a happy place, people naturally jump on board with us. Things are never as bad as we imagine them to be when we are in a negative state of mind. If you find yourself stressing out, relax. Take a breath, get a bite to eat, have a coffee, or take a walk. By getting into a happier place, you will see your situation more clearly. Things will improve in ways that you would have missed if you had muscled your way through. We all have things to do. The way we get through those things is up to us.
Edward Biagiotti is the Inclusion Specialist for Culver City Unified School District. He is also co-host of the popular radio show, Funniest Thing! with Darrell and Ed, to find out more go to www.DarrellandEd.com.