“He who is not courageous enough to take risks will accomplish nothing in life.” – Muhammad Ali
There are times when our minds want to pull the emergency brake on life. Out of the blue, sometimes in the midst of our greatest success, a panicked voice will come over the intercom in our head. That voice will tell us that things are too good to be true, too good to last, or that we are not qualified for the task at hand.
The good news is that we do not have to react to these ideas. If we are willing to use a few tricks, these moments need not last very long. In fact, if looked at from the right perspective, these voices turn into an invitation to be kind to ourselves.
My summer school session has been a great time to practice what I am preaching here. My roster is full of rambunctious personalities. This is nothing new to me, or any teacher, for that matter. The challenge is creating and maintaining a classroom experience that motivates the group, and inspires enthusiastic participation.
When I looked at the class list, my initial response was one of delight. I have known many of these students, now in middle school, since they were five years old. I looked forward to spending time with them as they mature into teenagers. However, as the first day of school approached, another voice started arising within me. I ignored it until the feeling of worry got too intense and had to be addressed. Within me there was a rush of questions about my abilities, and my willingness, to manage the class for five weeks.
Thankfully, there are tricks, or tools, available for occasions like these. For example, when the fear of the road ahead starts to override the feeling of joyful anticipation, we have to slow down. Only after we have taken the time to clear whatever resistance we are feeling, can we successfully charge ahead. Moving forward without first turning off the mental emergency brake, while possible, ends up putting too much wear and tear on our inner and outer lives.
The first step is to listen to the fears that are present within us. Write them down on a piece of paper or on the notepad of your phone. This action alone will get them out of the darkness of your mind and into the light of awareness. Like a child who finally has the courage to tell their parent that they are afraid the monster in the closet. You can then begin consciously choosing new thoughts to focus on, thoughts that are more aligned with what is true about you and the situation you are facing.
One way to do this is to write down what we know to be true from our past experiences.
For example, we can remind ourselves that we have felt this way before and have gone on to be successful anyway. We can also remind ourselves that rather than dooming us for failure, our fears put us in the ranks of all the great people throughout history who have accomplished things that seemed to be impossible. As we feed our mind with these nourishing thoughts the inner resistance will naturally release.
Once the feeling of relief comes over us, more positive thoughts will follow. We will begin to remember why we set out on the journey in the first place. In my case, I remembered how much I enjoy spending time with these students. I felt rejuvenated and empowered. This has translated into a successful first week of summer school for everyone involved.
If you are feeling like fear is standing in the way of your dreams, big or small, take heart. Welcome to the realm of successful people who dare to accomplish what seems impossible. For you this might be getting a degree, driving a bus, or just showing up at a family gathering. Regardless of what you are doing, or are going to do, you can do it.
Use these simple tools. Be sure to write your thoughts down, or confide with a friend who will help shine light on who you really are. It is important to set the time aside to do one thing; feel better. Once you do, the rest will be easy.
Edward Biagiotti is the Inclusion Specialist for Culver City Unified School District. He is also co-host of the popular radio show, Funniest Thing! with Darrell and Ed, to find out more go to www.DarrellandEd.com