Feline language of love

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Growing up, I always thought cats were aloof and too independent to show their love. My cats Enzo and Francis are just the opposite – extremely affectionate. Not only do they cuddle up with each other, but they love human attention. Enzo even loves curling up with Gabby, my dog. Francis, on the other hand, thinks Gabby is despicable and looks at her with such disdain as if to say, “What is this gruesome creature?” Well, I guess you can’t be loved by everyone.

So how do cats show fondness? And is it common? That depends on your cat’s basic personality, breeding and upbringing. A kitten shows love with behavior, so understanding feline body language and how they interact with fellow cats is important. I was fascinated to learn how a cat shows its affection.

On any given day, one can walk into my office and see Francis and Enzo grooming each other. Enzo grooms my husband, Gabby and me almost every morning. I just thought he was a neat-freak like the husband, and wanted everyone spotless. But I learned that grooming is not only about hygiene. Cats groom each other as a stress-reliever and to bond. And what if your feline friend grooms you? It’s a sign that you are accepted as part of his family, and a way of claiming ownership of you.

All our animals hang out wherever we are. If we’re watching TV, they are too. Going to bed? The animal parade follows. And if I’m honest, the whole gang follows me into the bathroom when I shower. Seems I always have an audience not far away. It didn’t surprise me to learn it’s a sign that my animals want to be where I am because of their fondness for me. Some cats that don’t usually display affection can still express their love by wanting to just be near you.

I’m grateful that my cats don’t bring me gifts, but it’s a sign of true love if your cat leaves you a mutilated bird or dead mouse on the doorstep. In your feline friend’s mind, he has bestowed a treasured gift upon you and as disgusting as it may be, is hoping you’ll be pleased with the offering.

Francis is a cat that acts more like a dog and sometimes a human. He is always waiting for me at the door when I come home. We have a large front window and, sure enough, every time I stick my key into the lock, his head will peek through the glass. I’ve even seen him get happy when the husband’s car pulls in the driveway – it’s like he knows “dad” is finally home, and he can’t wait to say hello.

Both Enzo and Francis will roll over and let us rub their bellies, much like dogs do. Francis, especially, loves it. I learned that is a major sign of trust and love. Exposing the belly shows vulnerability, and if a feline did that in the wild, chances are it wouldn’t last long. Essentially, this behavior shows that the kitten is comfortable enough with to let down its guard.

            The greatest expression of love that a cat can show is kneading. This instinctual gesture originates from birth, when the kitten kneaded its mother to stimulate milk flow. Later in life, kneading signifies contentment, pleasure and adoration, especially if accompanied by drooling. Enzo will exhibit this behavior once in a while, but Francis does it all the time – drooling included. I guess my boy, Francis, loves me more than even I realized.

Cats aren’t known to show outright affection and don’t shower their owners with sloppy kisses like dogs do, but that doesn’t mean they don’t love them. In their own understated way, cats will let you know where you stand. So take a closer look at your cat’s body language and behavior, you just might learn that it’s like a lovelorn teenager trying to get your attention and shower you with affection the only way it knows how.