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“Life is like a roller coaster, live it, be happy, enjoy life.” – Avril Lavigne
Everyone has something they enjoy doing. When we do what we enjoy, we naturally feel compelled to learn what we can and get better at it. For some people it is sports, for others it is sewing, reading, writing or playing video games. It could also be something as simple as watching a sunset. Regardless of what it is we enjoy doing, if we really enjoy it we tend to find ways to do it. If, on the other hand, we get disconnected from the things we enjoy, we lose our natural enthusiasm for life and sometimes we do not even notice it is gone.
One of the primary goals for me as an educator is to help my students identify the things they enjoy doing, and then encourage them to do those things with their whole heart. I find that many of the students I meet who are having challenges with behavior, or do not complete their school work, feel as though the things they enjoy doing do not really matter. This even comes up with my students who are getting good grades, and who are behaving perfectly by school standards. In all cases, however; I find that a certain spark is missing in children who do not feel like the things that they naturally love to do are valid.
This week, while on a photo shoot for our weekly radio show, “Funniest Thing! with Darrell and Ed,” I heard a simple way to sum up my philosophy toward education. The phrase was shared by Dave Kaptein, a professional photographer who has taken head shots for many highly successful actors in Hollywood, as well as had a successful career as a model and an actor. He described the way he has approached raising his children as “feeding the beast.” Kaptein shared that whatever his children were genuinely interested in pursuing, he would support them 100 percent. His son was accepted into USC film school this year, largely based on the success of his Youtube channel, and his daughter is currently finding success in modeling. These are two areas that Kaptein might not have chosen for his children, yet they were enthusiastic about doing these things so he supported them. I was inspired by this simple and effective approach to parenting, and it is very aligned with my own.
In my job, I often meet highly creative students who have given up on being successful because they struggle with traditional academics. Without a voice of encouragement, they are left to wonder if they are capable of success in any area of their life. The part of my job that seems like magic is the way problem areas tend to improve, and become more manageable, as my students honor their natural interests. It is as if part of them was shut off because they felt like there was no place for it in the world. Then, when that part is given permission to explore the things they naturally enjoy, that energy spills out into every area of their life.
My own son is very interested in video games and creating videos that involve him narrating his game play, and then posting the videos to his Youtube channel. The more I sit and listen to his experiences and support him in pursuing this activity, the closer we have become, and the more fun we have together. Last year, we even traveled to Florida to attend a Minecraft conference. My wife and I ended up feeling just as inspired as our son and it turned into a wonderful vacation. I see that my son is more receptive to the things I ask him to do because he knows that I respect him for who he is and what he enjoys doing. It is a great approach to parenting and education.
As always, I encourage you to reflect on the things you enjoy doing, and could do more of. Then ask yourself if there are any activities that your children or students are interested in that you have been judging as invalid, or unworthy of pursuing. Sometimes all it takes is a smile and a moment of acceptance, a simple gesture letting them, and yourself, know that it is okay to do the things we love, even if it does not seem to be getting us anywhere. It has worked for me, as I have been surfing everyday for the past year, and my level of satisfaction with everything I do has improved as a result. So feed the beast, you will be surprised by how he responds.
Edward Biagiotti is the Inclusion Specialist for Culver City Unified School District. He is also co-host of the popular radio show, Funniest Thing! with Darrell and Ed, live each week, Wednesdays at 3 pm on www.UnityOnlineRadio.org. Visit www.TappingIntoGenius.com for more articles and a free, inspirational parenting download.