Be the first to have fun

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Be the first to have fun

Just play. Have fun. Enjoy the game.

Michael Jordan

At times, when I am working with others, I feel stressed out.  Everything seems to be working against me, and no one seems to hear what I am saying.

I feel this overwhelming desire to hit the road or to lash out.  I start grasping for control, even if it means acting in ways that run counter to the person I enjoy being.

Finding safe and sane ways to manage myself and my life at these times is essential.

My friend recently reminded me of two things that have proven helpful.  The first is something called the devil’s last ditch.

When things are changing for the better, my old ways can activate.  They come up, seemingly out of nowhere, protesting the new and improved version of my life.

It may suddenly seem to me that nothing I am doing is right and my mind may start producing memories and reasons to back that perception up.

My friend reminded me to celebrate all of that inner resistance as a sure sign that things are improving.

I am always open to a new trick to keep myself on track, so I experimented with the idea of the devil’s last ditch.

Sure enough, I started noticing a direct connection between my own growth and my inner complainer, the part of me that wants to curl up in a ball and hide.

Put simply, I am learning to say, “Oh yes.” instead of, “Oh no.” when I wake up on the wrong side of the bed.

At the very least, it helps me to be easier on myself when I am already feeling under the gun.

Recently, it helped me recognize some amazing things in my life that are worth celebrating. It means being gentle with myself while the devil digs his last ditch.

The second thing that my friend reminded me was more practical in nature.  He said that the best way to get my students to engage with a desired activity is to engage in the activity myself.

Rather than raising my voice, in an attempt to overpower my unruly students, the goal is to be the most engaged and inspired person in the room.

The results have been wonderful.  Rather than walking around and directing the room from the outside, I have been reminding myself to get in the activity, and focus on having fun.  From here it has been much easier to redirect my students to do the same.

When I am engaged in a creative activity my perception of what is happening is very different.  Suddenly, I see that the majority of my students are engaged and that it is only one or two of them who are not.

Because my mind is in creative mode, I find creative ways to engage those harder to reach students.

For example, one of my students has been reluctant to draw or paint in the past.  He told me that he just likes to watch.  The more I pushed, the more he shut down.

Last week I took a different approach.  I drew a face on a big piece of paper and the boy started telling me a story about the character.

I wrote down the words he was saying alongside the face I had drawn.  Next, I started painting the face and gave him some simple ways to help me paint.  I told him to paint the hair brown and handed him a brush.

He jumped right in and proceeded to finish the painting on his own.  This week, he drew the sidekick of last week’s character, and went on to paint it independently.

I have learned that a leader is simply a person who is willing to step into the circle first.

From there others will follow, and their own leadership qualities will emerge.  So let’s jump in and have fun with life.

Once we tap into the genius of our own creativity, the people we work with, children and adults, will follow right along.  It is only natural.