“Don’t let the muggles get you down.” – J.K. Rowling, Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban
My job as the Inclusion Specialist requires me to maintain an open mind about what is possible and what is valuable. People come to me who are outside of the standard definition of normal and I get to support them in being successful in school and in life. I love this job because I am a voice of encouragement and hope in the lives of the students that I meet. By holding the door open for others to be successful, I also remind myself of my own value and my own worthiness.
Being a voice of hope for my students can be challenging. It is something that I have been learning about for the past 17 years. There are some students who are experts at pushing their teachers away by constantly engaging in disruptive behaviors. It takes focus to stay engaged with these students, and to avoid getting caught in the power struggles that they attempt to instigate. In order to do this I have to be clear about why I am doing the job in the first place.
I sincerely enjoy the feeling I get when my students tap into their own potential. I love witnessing the accompanying admiration of their teachers and parents. I enjoy this feeling so much that I do not need awards or acknowledgment for the work I do. For me, that experience of witnessing positive growth and transformation in my students is the prize I seek. The fulfillment I feel motivates me to be patient with them and be open to the teachable moments when they arise. It is exciting to be a part of the process.
In order to stay motivated, I have learned to ask myself, “What is in it for me?” In the past I associated this question with greed or selfishness. I thought it was wrong for me to think in those terms. I am beginning to understand that if I neglect myself and my own desires, I no longer have anything left to give to others. It is sharing from my joy and fulfillment that brings out the best in my students, and allows me to persevere in the face of challenging relationships. Supporting myself is the first step in extending that same type of unconditional support to others.
I was at a lunch group this week and the students were getting out of hand. They were yelling and ignoring me. I was feeling tired and frustrated. I knew that I needed to take a leadership role. I looked the loudest student in the eye and told him that I was going to lead the group now. While maintaining eye contact, I let him know that if he was thinking that he was going to lead the group astray he was wrong. Next, when I had his attention, I started chuckling and pointed at him, as if to say, “Got you!” He smiled and the group calmed down. Then a boy who is typically loud and impulsive walked over to me. He offered me a hug. Then another student did the same. I was touched by these acts of compassion and I let them know. By stepping up to support the group, they had returned the favor.
If you are feeling worn out, take a moment to think about what you need. Think about things that naturally inspire and energize you. Consider ways to you can provide yourself with more of the things and activities that get you going. Then think of ways you can extend that same type of encouragement to the people around you. Everyone needs a cheerleader once in a while. If you start by cheering yourself on, it is natural to cheer for others as well.
Edward Biagiotti is the Inclusion Specialist for Culver City Unified School District. He is also co-host of the popular radio show, Funniest Thing! with Darrell and Ed, live each week, Wednesdays at 3 p.m. on www.UnityOnlineRadio.org. Visit www.TappingIntoGenius.com for more articles and a free, inspirational parenting download.