“It will help us ev’ry day, it will brighten all the way, if we keep on the sunny side of life.” – Keep on the Sunnyside, The Carter Family
Have you ever seen a big, beautiful full moon and had the desire to capture it with the camera on your smart phone? Unless you know something I don’t, you have probably had the same results that I have. With your eyes the moon looks like a picture from National Geographic Magazine, then when you look at your photo it looks more like a tiny speck of light, indiscernible from nearby streetlights or the headlights of cars passing by.
I was discussing this phenomenon with Darrell Fusaro, my co-host on “Funniest Thing! with Darrell and Ed.” Darrell, a professional visual artist, pointed out that our brains come with a built in zoom feature. Whatever we are looking at is actually magnified in our field of vision so that we can better focus on it. I had never thought about this before and now it makes perfect sense. Try it for yourself by scanning the room and focusing on one particular object. Notice how it seems to be larger than other objects surrounding it. Then take a smart phone photo and see how tiny it appears.
In psychology it is known that we tend to get more thoughts like the ones we are thinking. This is why, when we are feeling good, there is a momentum that carries us joyfully through our day. If, on the other hand, we are feeling anxious or afraid, it can be challenging to find thoughts that feel good. Like our eyes, our mind magnifies what we are choosing to think about. Moreover, our mind magnifies the perspective through which we are looking. This is why people have such diverse points of views, and belief systems, and they all seem to make sense to the people thinking them. In a sense, we get to construct our world based on the lens through which we are looking. Our beliefs actually begin to reinforce themselves, and over time we gravitate towards people, books, and other media that justify our point of view.
I see this same effect with the students that I am working with. Regardless of their natural abilities, the way they look at the world, and what they believe about who they are, has a major impact on their experience. I know students who have genius level IQ’s and yet have developed beliefs, over time, that they are not capable of being successful in school. Many of these ideas started when they were younger and felt different than the people around them. At an early age they made a decision that being different was a bad thing, and that there was something wrong with them. In the case of these students, I help them to see that their differences are gifts and that they must rethink the conclusions they made in the past. One of the best ways to facilitate this change is to support them in being successful in the area that they once believed they were not capable; namely completing their school work and getting the rewards that come with it.
How could a person with a genius IQ believe they are not intelligent? It is simple and you don’t have to be a genius to fall into this trap. I will give an example of how this works in my life. If I am in a doubtful and worried place, my mind starts to race. It will embark on a frantic search for what is wrong. The more I think, the more things I find are wrong. This only adds to the original feeling of overwhelm and quickly leads into despair. If, however, I take a moment to slow down and check the facts, or make a list of all that is going well in my life, the picture I see starts to change. Most of the time there are just a few simple action steps I need to take in order to produce a desirable outcome, and turn my day and my life into a successful, pleasant experience.
It is worth it to take the time to check in with your mind. Notice which direction your thoughts are going. Are your thoughts leading you to a feeling of confidence, and appreciation, or are they leading you to more worries and a feeling of powerlessness? Either way it is okay. If you are feeling good, take the time to savor the thoughts and feelings so that they expand. If you are feeling bad, take the time to slow down, make a quick list of what is going well in your life. Make sure you have eaten recently and that you are not over tired. It only takes a few minutes to check in and stabilize your mood so that you can proceed into a successful day. You are worth it.
Edward Biagiotti is the Inclusion Specialist for Culver City Unified School District. He is also co-host of the popular radio show, Funniest Thing! with Darrell and Ed, live each week at 3 pm on www.UnityOnlineRadio.org. Visit www.TappingIntoGenius.com for more articles and a free, inspirational parenting download.