“Everyone has inside of him a piece of good news.” – Anne Frank
There are days when it is hard to stay positive because of challenging conditions going on in our lives. There is an old saying that when you focus on something, you get more of it, and when you focus on your lack of something, you get even farther from obtaining it. This is true for the positive and for the negative experiences in our lives. If I am feeling really happy then I seem to find more reasons to be happy, and if I am feeling upset, then I tend to find more reasons to be upset. While this can seem unfair if I am having a challenging day, when I look more closely I find that this is the key to my freedom. If I really want to change the way my day is going, I have to start with my attitude and point of view. I call it choosing to be the good news.
I came up with the idea of being the good news when I was having a tough day as the Inclusion Specialist for Culver City Unified School District. I was in the midst of organizing meetings which involved multiple parties and paperwork, as well as running lunch groups and helping students. The stress was getting to me as I sat in my car, parked outside of the district office, fearing what news might await me when I went to check in for the day. I was on a negative roll and part of me assumed it would get worse. Instead of going further down that negative road, I took a moment to slow down and reflect on what was happening. I opened myself to another perspective, even though I was not sure what that would be.
That is when it hit me. I was waiting for the world around me to start delivering some good news. I was hoping that a parent would call and agree to a meeting date, or that another parent would sign a document we needed delivered. All of those things were out of my control so I was feeling powerless. I realized that I had another option for approaching my visit to the District Office. Instead of hoping to hear good news, I decided that I would be the good news. I decided to shift gears and be my normally happy self. If anyone asked how things were going I would tell them that things were going great.
To support myself in this endeavor, and so I would not be lying, I took a moment to think of my wife and son, to appreciate the job I do for the district, and to send love to all of my co-workers. I thought about how blessed I am to have a car and to work in such a beautiful city. Sure enough, I started to feel better. The visit turned out to be a fantastic experience because I was the one shining light on others, rather than hoping someone would shine light on me. I realized that, in the past, when going through challenging experiences, I would dim my own light out of fear. By choosing to step out boldly and shine my light, I had a renewed feeling of gratitude and the good news started to come my way. It was like I had become a match to the very thing I was seeking.
Are there any areas in your life where you are holding onto bad news, and fearing that more will come? It is easy to feel victimized at those times. I recommend taking a moment to shift your focus into what is going well. Start with easy subjects, like I did, and then think of some positives about the situations that are worrying you. It can be as simple as sending some positive thoughts in the direction of the people involved or silently blessing the situation in your own way. Whatever you do, see if you can be the one that starts bringing the good news to the world around you. It is always fun to see what comes back when you do.
Edward Biagiotti is the Inclusion Specialist for Culver City Unified School District. He is also co-host of the popular radio show, Funniest Thing! with Darrell and Ed, live each week, Wednesdays at 3 pm on www.UnityOnlineRadio.org. For more articles, and a free, downloadable guide to connecting with children, go to www.TappingIntoGenius.com